How Feminism Makes Women Unhappy and Undatable

How Feminism Makes Women Unhappy and Undatable

If I were an evil scientist designing a virus to make women depressed, broken-hearted, and disconnected, that virus would behave exactly like gender feminism.




How Feminism Makes Women Unhappy and Undatable

No man should venture into romance without a solid risk management strategy. That’s why I wrote “The Tactical Guide to Women.” The right woman can change a man's life. So can the wrong one. I want to help men choose wisely.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cXo58z5uxo8&feature=youtu.be


Shawn T. Smith (@ironshrink) · Twitter


Cognitive Dissonance
In the field of psychology, cognitive dissonance occurs when a person holds two or more contradictory beliefs, ideas, or values; or participates in an action that goes against one of these three, and experiences psychological stress because of that. According to this theory, when two actions or ideas are not psychologically consistent with each other, people do all in their power to change them until they become consistent. The discomfort is triggered by the person's belief clashing with new information perceived, wherein they try to find a way to resolve the contradiction to reduce their discomfort.






00:00

here's the story fellas a few weeks ago

00:02

i made a video about why men should

00:04

avoid dating feminists it's part of my

00:06

pointing out the obvious series

00:07

one of the most important points in that

00:09

video is the fact that feminists cannot

00:10

tolerate success and you can't have a

00:12

solid relationship if one partner is

00:14

invested in failure but i took that

00:16

important point

00:17

and i buried it at the end of the video

00:19

and i didn't explain it so let me take a

00:20

few minutes here and talk about one of

00:22

the most important reasons men should

00:24

adamantly avoid women who have bought

00:25

into feminist ideology

00:28

first off let me repeat something i said

00:29

in that original video which is that i

00:31

don't lump all feminists together

00:32

because two different women can describe

00:34

themselves as feminists and mean nearly

00:36

opposite things

00:37

on one end of the spectrum are equity

00:39

feminists who want equality between men

00:41

and women including equal opportunity

00:43

and equal responsibility

00:44

and at the other end are the gender

00:46

feminists these are the female

00:48

supremacists

00:49

they have no interest in equality for

00:51

them it's about making men

00:52

pay and i suppose there are women on all

00:54

points between those extremes

00:56

in that original video i used two

00:58

primary sources one was a prominent

01:00

washington post editorial from last june

01:02

called why can't we hate

01:04

men and the other was a popular gender

01:06

studies textbook

01:07

i chose the editorial because it's a

01:09

blunt and accurate representation of

01:11

feminism in the media

01:12

and i chose the textbook because it's a

01:14

fair and accurate representation of the

01:16

kind of feminism

01:17

young women are exposed to on campus the

01:19

college campus is ground zero it's where

01:21

young women

01:22

are taught to think and act like gender

01:24

feminists

01:25

let me tell you reading that book was

01:27

not easy but there's no better way to

01:29

understand what's being taught to young

01:30

women in universities than to go to the

01:32

source

01:33

and women are being taught that

01:34

masculinity is built on violence and

01:36

oppression

01:37

and racism and that men should be hated

01:39

and punished for all the sins we've

01:41

committed against women over the

01:42

centuries

01:43

i suppose that doesn't include things

01:45

like indoor plumbing or english common

01:47

law but you know all the bad stuff

01:49

so today i'm talking about the kind of

01:51

feminists who are not necessarily

01:52

obvious pink-haired intersectional

01:54

extremists but they believe what they

01:56

hear from gender studies departments in

01:58

almost every other department in the

01:59

humanities

02:00

and they believe what they hear so often

02:02

in the media about how unfair their

02:03

lives are

02:04

let's look at something like the pink

02:06

tax it's a great example of the type of

02:07

thing that makes gender feminists

02:09

absolutely undateable if you don't know

02:11

what i'm talking about the pink tax is

02:13

the feminist belief that hygiene items

02:15

and basic services like dry cleaning

02:17

cost more for women

02:18

because it's just one more way evil men

02:20

can oppress them as if there are no

02:22

women working at estee lauder or the

02:23

local dry cleaner

02:25

the pink tax has been repeatedly

02:27

debunked some products just cost more

02:29

for women because the ingredients are

02:30

more expensive and women like expensive

02:32

packaging

02:33

and as for the dry cleaning argument is

02:35

cheaper for men's clothing because

02:36

women's clothing is more complicated to

02:38

clean

02:39

but facts don't matter when you're on a

02:41

mission to be oppressed and that's what

02:42

gender feminism is all about

02:44

what matters is the narrative and i'm

02:46

not just talking about the spoken

02:47

narrative i'm talking about the internal

02:49

narrative

02:50

feminists have to maintain the belief

02:51

that they're being oppressed

02:53

feminism is logic for losers it's a

02:56

pursuit of misery

02:57

but it's misery with a purpose the

02:59

wretchedness that they're trying to

03:00

achieve is their ticket to the high

03:02

moral ground and the high moral ground

03:04

is their ticket to financial and

03:05

personal success victimhood

03:08

is their currency let me give you an

03:09

example in the original video i quoted

03:12

susannah denuda walters who wrote that

03:14

washington post editorial where she

03:15

complains about

03:16

institutional male power and unpaid

03:19

labor in the home and a culture

03:20

permeated by

03:21

violence against women and everything in

03:23

between her argument is that men

03:25

all of us deserve to be hated unless we

03:28

step aside and voluntarily give gender

03:30

feminists like her the reigns of power

03:32

so who is this walters the way she talks

03:34

about her society she must live in some

03:36

backward corner of the world where men

03:38

treat women like chattel right

03:40

well no she's a 10 year gender studies

03:42

professor at northeastern university in

03:44

boston

03:45

that's one of the most liberal places in

03:47

one of the most liberal cities on the

03:48

planet

03:49

if she were being mistreated in any way

03:51

i'm sure we would certainly know about

03:53

it

03:53

now ten-year professorships are some of

03:55

the most secure cushy gigs in the world

03:57

and in a department like gender studies

03:59

you don't even have to think logically

04:01

you can't even get fired unless you

04:02

completely lose your noodle and actually

04:04

assault someone

04:05

and even then you might end up with a

04:07

better position inside the system

04:09

and how does a person earn this cushy

04:11

high paying gender studies gig

04:13

well you don't have to cure a disease or

04:15

rescue anyone from a burning building

04:17

or grow food or fix plumbing or drive a

04:19

truck or do anything useful at all

04:21

you just have to find new and exciting

04:23

ways to be outraged

04:25

you complain your way to the top it's

04:27

winning by losing

04:29

i've read my share of essays by people

04:30

like walters and i notice a theme that

04:33

flows through all of it and i have to

04:34

assume

04:34

that this idea sits in the mind of every

04:36

woman who buys into feminist ideology

04:39

it's the idea that they're not

04:40

responsible for their own success

04:42

because society is responsible for their

04:44

failure they're oppressed by

04:46

everyone from the president all the way

04:48

down to the guy who sells their

04:49

deodorant

04:50

and whenever something doesn't go their

04:51

way they can always convince themselves

04:53

that they've been treated unfairly

04:55

but that's just one benefit victimhood

04:57

is a path to power because it rallies

04:59

people to your side

05:00

most people love a good underdog story

05:02

including me one of my favorite movies

05:04

is braveheart

05:05

in that movie the hero william wallace

05:07

fought for people who were truly

05:09

oppressed

05:10

they were dealt with violently and they

05:11

were taxed into poverty

05:13

and wallace rose up against the

05:14

oppressors and he martyred himself

05:16

that's a very cool story if you have any

05:17

kind of soul you have to root for the

05:19

guy

05:20

now feminists can trick people into

05:22

believing that they're fighting the same

05:23

battle as braveheart then they can cash

05:25

in on that same kind of sympathy

05:27

but since they're not actually oppressed

05:29

by anyone then they have to pretend that

05:31

they're oppressed

05:32

and the pretense of victimhood comes at

05:34

a heavy cost which is that they can't

05:36

allow themselves to appear successful

05:38

because appearing successful would

05:39

undermine the victim narrative

05:41

and anything that undermines the victim

05:42

narrative threatens the currency

05:45

that leads to success and power this is

05:47

the quandary of the modern feminists

05:49

you can't be powerful unless you're a

05:51

victim but you can't be a victim

05:53

if you're powerful an influential

05:55

psychologist named leon festinger put a

05:57

name to this kind of internal conflict

05:59

he called it cognitive dissonance

06:01

that's when the behaviors that you see

06:02

yourself doing don't match your beliefs

06:04

people don't like feeling cognitive

06:06

dissonance so we try to resolve it by

06:08

either adjusting our beliefs to match

06:09

our behavior

06:10

or adjusting our behavior to match our

06:12

beliefs and we do this because we're an

06:14

animal that values consistency and

06:15

predictability

06:16

even within ourselves so when a feminist

06:18

hears herself complaining about the

06:20

patriarchy but at the same time

06:22

sees herself in a world where men are

06:24

actually treating her pretty well

06:25

then she's got a bad case of cognitive

06:27

dissonance and she has to make a choice

06:30

one option is to drop the victim

06:31

narrative and start enjoying life

06:33

but that kind of attitude adjustment is

06:35

a pretty tall order for most people

06:36

especially someone who believes that

06:38

they're not the ones who need to change

06:39

it's the rest of the world that's unfair

06:42

so option two is to alter her behavior

06:44

to prop

06:45

up her beliefs for feminists that means

06:47

doubling down on the victim narrative

06:49

and finding any evidence of that

06:50

imaginary patriarchy that's keeping her

06:52

down

06:53

that's where they come up with

06:54

ridiculous irrational complaints like

06:56

the pink tax

06:57

facts don't matter when a person is

06:59

trying to resolve cognitive dissonance

07:00

by propping up their failing beliefs

07:02

and that's a human trait not just a

07:04

feminist trait but when a gender

07:05

feminist sees herself succeeding

07:07

and isn't willing to question her

07:09

worldview then the only thing that

07:10

matters is finding

07:11

any kind of evidence that she's being

07:13

oppressed because when she sees herself

07:15

fighting her oppressors

07:16

even if they're only imaginary then she

07:18

sees that her behavior

07:20

is aligned with her beliefs and that

07:21

resolves the cognitive dissonance i

07:23

think this is why feminists protest more

07:25

and more loudly the better they're doing

07:27

in life

07:28

and by the way this is why you probably

07:29

shouldn't be married to your ideology

07:31

you should have one i do but you

07:33

shouldn't attach it to your identity or

07:35

your success because sooner or later

07:36

reality is going to disagree with your

07:38

ideology

07:39

and you'll have to make a choice you can

07:41

either adjust your world view and get on

07:42

with your day

07:43

or you can fight for your stupid wrong

07:45

beliefs and look like an idiot

07:47

so let me give you an example of how the

07:48

feminist establishment teaches women to

07:50

reject success

07:52

and look like idiots rather than adjust

07:53

their worldview

07:55

this example comes from the textbook i

07:56

used in my original video

07:58

that book is overflowing with examples

08:00

of feminists who appear to be resolving

08:02

cognitive dissonance by [ __ ] on

08:03

their own good news

08:04

but my favorite example comes from a

08:06

1994 essay by

08:08

lisa marie hoagland called fear of

08:10

feminism now you might be saying sean

08:12

that essay is almost 25 years old why

08:13

don't you use an example from this

08:15

century

08:15

and you'd be right that essay is old and

08:17

my copy of the book is outdated it's

08:19

from 2011 and the current edition is

08:21

2014.

08:22

but the same 24 year old essay still

08:24

shows up in the current edition

08:26

it's right between an essay called

08:27

feminist men written by a feminist man

08:31

and an essay titled fracking is a

08:33

feminist issue because when you're a

08:35

gender feminist

08:36

everything's an issue and it's always

08:38

personal so in this essay hoagland is

08:40

making the case that it's difficult to

08:42

be the one who speaks out against

08:43

society

08:44

and that's a valid point in general

08:45

though i'd argue that feminists aren't

08:47

punished for their beliefs at least not

08:48

in the western world and certainly not

08:50

at the university of cincinnati where

08:52

hoaglan teaches

08:53

i'm sure she's considered brave and

08:55

admirable by the people around her

08:57

but anyway she's meandering toward her

08:58

main point she has this passage

09:01

feminists have fostered awareness of

09:03

violence against women and it is to our

09:04

credit that we've made our analysis so

09:06

powerful

09:07

at the same time however we must attend

09:09

to the ways that this awareness can be

09:10

deployed for non-feminist and even

09:12

anti-feminist purposes

09:14

and most especially to the ways it can

09:16

be used to serve a racist

09:17

agenda now feminist essays are always

09:20

hard to read because the writing is so

09:22

convoluted but she's clearly making the

09:24

case here that by decreasing violence

09:26

against women

09:27

you increase racism in men nowhere in

09:31

the essay does she explain that

09:32

alleged correlation nowhere in the

09:34

entire book can i find

09:36

anything approaching an explanation and

09:38

without a very clear

09:39

and persuasive explanation this is just

09:41

a non-sequitur on stilts

09:43

from a logical standpoint it's pure

09:45

gibberish however

09:47

from an emotional standpoint it's a

09:49

thing of beauty because it resolves the

09:50

cognitive dissonance

09:52

first she grudgingly acknowledges a

09:54

success but then she immediately

09:56

and irrationally and baselessly asserts

09:59

that the success

10:00

will create more racist men and racist

10:02

men are probably the worst thing

10:03

imaginable in her ideology

10:05

that's how she turns the good news into

10:07

bad news and once she's done that her

10:09

world is once again a terrible place

10:11

filled with evil men and she can relax

10:14

because she's re-established her

10:15

consistency

10:16

personally i would expect anyone to

10:18

celebrate a safer world for women

10:20

anyone except gender feminist to them

10:23

good news is a threat to their identity

10:25

and their power

10:26

so fellas let's bring it back to you and

10:28

your life when you attach yourself to

10:30

someone who's invested in losing

10:32

you're going to lose for one thing

10:33

you'll never be able to resolve a

10:34

conflict with her after the honeymoon

10:36

phase because conflict is her natural

10:38

state

10:38

you may experience little victories here

10:40

and there but if she starts to feel warm

10:42

feelings toward

10:43

anything masculine like you then her

10:45

feminist ideology

10:46

and her cognitive dissonance will drive

10:48

you right back into conflict

10:50

and guess what if she sees men as her

10:52

oppressors she's eventually going to see

10:54

you as her oppressor but even when she's

10:57

not in conflict with you her natural

10:58

state of conflict with the rest of the

11:00

world is bound to steer you away from

11:01

your goals

11:02

there's going to be a lot of long

11:03

exhausting conversations about how

11:05

people are mistreating her

11:07

and eventually her enemies start to

11:08

become your enemies

11:10

i see this in my clinical practice all

11:12

the time and not just with feminists

11:14

people are naturally sympathetic to

11:15

their partners and we tend to take up

11:16

their causes so it's really

11:18

counterproductive to attach yourself to

11:19

someone who has a beef with the whole

11:21

world

11:22

because you're going to end up with a

11:23

whole lot of antagonism in your life

11:25

and if you have any kind of goals and

11:27

ambitions you just don't need this kind

11:28

of obstacle

11:29

now most guys will naturally turn away

11:31

from perpetual victims once they know

11:33

how to recognize them but let's be

11:34

honest there are plenty of guys

11:36

who are actually attracted to this

11:37

dynamic it's usually because they're

11:39

good guys who are looking to help

11:41

and they get a lot out of it what they

11:42

get is not generally healthy

11:44

but it is reinforcing for one thing

11:46

partnering with a gender feminist or any

11:48

other perpetual victim creates this

11:50

false camaraderie where it's you and me

11:52

against the world and you can show her

11:53

what a great guy you are

11:55

by really empathizing and getting angry

11:57

at the world right along with her

11:59

but that camaraderie only lasts until

12:00

she gets mad at you

12:02

then you are the oppressor and you have

12:03

to work your way back into her good

12:05

graces

12:06

and unfortunately that's the unwinnable

12:08

battle that some guys are attracted to

12:10

another benefit to partnering with a

12:12

victim is that it just gives you a sense

12:13

of purpose

12:14

she becomes your project if you can keep

12:16

her happy then you get to feel like

12:18

you're doing something useful in the

12:19

world

12:20

the problem of course is that happiness

12:22

is not her goal so you can't succeed

12:25

you might as well put your energy

12:26

elsewhere but i imagine that most guys

12:28

end up dating feminists just because

12:30

they don't know what they're getting

12:31

into

12:31

they haven't been burned yet and if

12:33

that's you i hope you can spot the signs

12:35

and get out before it's too late

12:37

and really this all comes down to one

12:39

bit of advice only allow people into

12:40

your inner circle

12:41

and that includes dating if they have a

12:44

strong sense of personal responsibility

12:46

and an investment in success

12:47

and you can't find that in someone who

12:49

needs to believe that they're being

12:50

mistreated

12:52

all right fellas that's all i got to say

12:53

about that so be careful out there
12:55
and we'll talk to you soon take care






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